Three times Khum wanted to lay Mula down, and one

我的崽 我约的翻译 尘尘翻的 感谢尘尘
Not until he said that word out.

The first time Mula was pinned onto the bed by Khum, he thought it was nothing but some nowhere-to-put energy of boys. He indulged, raising the corner of his mouth while wondering what Khum was going to do.
“What's up?”He asked.Khum said nothing but touched Mula softly and kissed his hindneck.
He was the opposite of skilled, and his flirting just came out of intuition. Mula felt amused. He unzippered the young man’s trousers, rubbing that part of him. Of course it was a hand job,and soon thick seminal fluid was spat out on his hand.
Khum looked annoyed. A seventeen-year-old kid,  Mula thought. Quiet amusing.
“You wanna learn that?” He hummed out a laugh,spreading himself and smearing all those fluid onto the sheet. Khum let out a long breath, copying his tricks to deal with Mula's penis. It didn’t last long. Mula was surprised that Khum leaned down to give him a lick. He pushed him away, grabbing Khum's hand to give himself a release. Khum looked at the semen on his hand, and all of a sudden he shortened their distance, pressing a kiss on Mula's lips.
Khum didn’t explain this while Mula got more surprised. He just turned his way to the bathroom, leaving his back to Mula.
From then on, Mula began to realize those stares falling on him.It was not easy for him. He intended not to wear his bathrobe widely open like before, and Khum seemed to have known that he was noticed. But he didn’t stop the stares.
“Listen,Mula…” Khum said.
About a month later, Mula was maintaining his shuriken and dagger by the table after dinner, and Khum looked upon him, standing between him and the bed. “Last time I…” he said, “That might not be an accident.”
“I think I...It's still…It's still attractive to me.”
He looked guilty, as nervous as a prisoner who was sentenced to death standing in front of the gallows.
“I get it.” Mula put down the oil in his hand, “And you can just tell me.”
Khum was shocked,raising his head slightly to look at Mula's expression.
His puppy eyes…Mula thought,who the hell can deal with it.
It had been long since the last time Mula slept with others. He didn’t run into anyone that meet his eyes, and this just gave him enough time to think about that kiss from Khum. He couldn’t set up his mind, not knowing how to refuse Khum, nor how to accept him. He didn’t hate him, but considering how long it had been for him to take Khum as his apprentice and family...However, the image of “puppy” pushed him to make the decision at this moment. So he didn’t resist when Khum bent over to kiss him gingerly.
He didn’t refuse the kiss, so he ended up in this situation: he was pushed down onto the table, while Khum’s waist was wrapped by his legs, and there was only one thin layer of cloth standing between the young man’s hot, hard cock and his skin on the inner side of his thigh.
“Use that.” Mula pointed at the bottle of oil he used to maintain his weapon, which was just wiped down under the table. Khum picked up that little bottle, he examined it in detail, then put it aside on the table and took off Mula’s pants.
He didn’t use that oil directly. Instead, he had Mula’s quiet penis in his mouth, and this time he was not pushed away. He used his tongue to take care of the head, sucking it as the only thing he wanna do was to please Mula.
Khum was a great prentice. He learned fast, not only when he learned those sword skills, but also now. He definitely got some points. Mula felt well; he couldn't help but pushing himself deeper into Khum’s mouth, and thanks to his last defence of continence, he pulled him out before ejecting on his own clothes.
He felt his body was out of strength. His leg fell, tiptoe reaching the floor.
Khum seemed to be caught off his guard. He thought about two seconds and turned Mula over, then he pulled Mula’s pants off to the knees and used his legs.
This enraged Mula, kind of. He felt a bit of humiliation. Khum acted differently from his usual docile self; he was unresistable when he turned Mula over. Mula had a sense that things might be going out of his control.
Later, in some evening, Khum tried to fawn him, approaching from the back to hug him after tidying up the dinner table. Mula escaped, and Khum looked like a poor little dog who was just kicked.
He stepped back. “I thought we had a deal.” He said.
Mula was speechless. Yes, they had. He had approved. “I just need to take a shower.” He could only say like that. Khum nodded.
The piece of rage stuck in Mula's mind again during his bath. It shouldn’t be like this, Mula thought. That kid’s response...he appeared to give permission,and Mula was the person who was asking for it. But he still prepared everything: he did the lavement, washed himself inside and out like a lamb waiting for his own death. Then Khum also entered the bathroom after he coming out, and it was not long before he came out with steam and water all around him.
“Come here, Khum.” He stopped what he was doing and call his name, stretching his body in bed. Khum followed, the puppy-like look appeared on his face again. He used his nose to rub against Mula’s neck, warm breath sauntering on the skin.Then Khum sat up on his waist, fingers flitting downward from his collarbone, after stopping at the nip for a quick touch he finally made it all the way down to the flank.
“Need me to teach you again?” Mula asked.
“Not really...” Khum answered. He frowned, while dip his head to Mula’s neck.
His fang reached Mula’s skin, but after all he didn’t bite. Nibbles changed into kisses, and he kissed him again and again. Both of his hands were upon Mula’s chest, lingering on evey scar. Mula was turned on. “Enough.” He said. The worship in Khum’s touch gave him some uneasy feelings. He grabbed Khum’s hand, asking him to look into each other’s eyes. “Come on.”
Then Khum reached out for the oil in the bedside cupboard. He daubed it on his hand, let the fingertip to scout Mula’s inner.
“Just unfurl it...” Mula pushed up a little and watched his move. He took in a deep breath when his erogenous zone was reached. This made Khum hesitated, but he let him move on.
It was not until he was fucked directly from the very front side and his arm wrapped around Khum’s back did he realize one simple fact: whether he admitted it or not, Khum had already grown up, as adult as he was. He was still thinner than other adventurers, but he also had sturdy back and tough arms, which were almost able to bundle him in. He didn’t suffer as much as Mula, but there were still a respectable amount of scars on his skin. These were the evidence proving Khum’s growing up. They were thrown onto his face just like that, forcing him to accept the fact that the little black cat he took home from the street...was no longer a child.
To be honest, the sex was not really good at first. Khum was a impetuous novice, he had passion, but nothing else. But as Mula had already known, he was claver enough. He became aware of what he should do just by carefully looking into Mula’s reaction.
Every time he shoved in, he aimed at Mula's most sensitive areas. Mula felt he was floating. His breathing was no longer under control,and  groans were pushed out by those shoves, in which his voice was totally soaked in lust. He grabbed the sheet tightly instead of Khum’s shoulders, grinding his teeth to resist the impulse.
Then he was turned over without any warning. He was changed into a groveling position, his left shoulder stuck to the bed, and there was no way to move at all.
Khum didn’t even quit his body while doing all of these, only pulled out a little when he made sure that he was restrained, and began to strike in way harder and deeper than before. Mula’s tail stiffened, wiping on Khum’s belly randomly. It was waved away then tangled by Khum’s tale, forbidding his further movement.
Mula wanted to turn back to look at him, but the press on his shoulder was even harder, forcing his face staying in the bed. The sheet was cold covered by his saliva; this feeling was really unpleasant.
“A...ah...!” Mula’s words shattered when he tried to stop. Khum was no longer pressing him, instead, he bent over on him, his sweating chest clinging to his back. He bitten his ear fiercely, one hand reaching down to touch his genital. These were too much for Mula, he choked and reaching his orgasm. Khum climaxed in his cramp, he pulled out hurriedly then blurted on his leg.
At this moment, no one talked, only venting voices were left between them.
Mula tried to get up, wiping away the spit around the corner of his mouth. “This is not gonna work.” He panted heavily, eyes looked red, glaring at the floor.
“This is not gonna work.”
He repeated it , belted his bathrobe again, then staggered to the bathroom
Khum watched the door closing. Images of his sperm flowing down on Mula’s leg filled up his mind.
I screwed it up.He thought in despair.
Mula didn’t go back home for dinner in the following days, nor go back to sleep. He didn’t know how to face Khum.
He went to the whores and payed them a lot, even those Miqo’te girls who were usually unwilling to serve their own kind liked to serve him. He fucked them in to the sheets as Khum did to him, but unspeakable shame still haunted in his mind. The dizzy feeling after organism helped him escape from everything, however, later when he lied in darkness being too tired to fall asleep, he started to think...Maybe he was doing wrong.
Maybe he shouldn’t have treated Khum’s first try like a joke, or accepted those further desires...Most of all, he shouldn’t have avoided him without a word like this.
Mula knew that he was always indulging Khum about almost everything-- except one year and a half ago he set a veto to entering the secret arena again. He never thought he could be considered as a real father, or a senior to any standard. Let along now...No senior would do what he had done, he cursed himself silently.
This was meaningless, he thought.
But he went back home in the dusk after all, about a week later. Eventually he had to admit there was no use arguing with himself.
Khum’s eyes lit up when he saw him. Then next moment he had already been in the kitchen to make dinner, not only Mula’s favorite dishes, and even a pie was presented. It seemed like an apology, but Khum didn’t name it, so Mula wouldn’t ask.
From then on, their relationship seemed stuck in the mud.
Khum was becoming more and more like a qualified adventurer after his eighteenth birthday. He spent more and more time being absent from home, stepping over Eorzea.
Khum dared not to mention the laying thing to irritate Mula. Sometimes he offered a handjob, only to solve the need of both. Mula didn’t make clear his attitude about this. He sighed deeply in his heart, yielding the touches and kisses from Khum.
And before long, Mula hurt himself.
He had never hurt that badly during the missions for a long time. He was not a newbie, and of course he knew how to protect himself in dangerous situation. If asked, he might answer with carelessness, which almost resulted in disability of his knee, tibia and ankle on one side. Being absent for about half a month, Khum didn’t know anything about it until he finally went back home. He was welcomed by the splints and bandages on the leg of Mula, who was moving downstairs with obvious challenge.
It was the first time that Mula saw this kind of expression appearing on Khum’s face. He stared at Mula’s right leg without a word, then raised his eyes to look at the face. He let out a long sigh, shoulders collapsing as if he was broken down.
“One call, and I would come back from anywhere for you.”he said, “you knew that.”
He stopped for lacking of words, dragged Mula to the bedroom. “I’ll make the dinner.” he said and then left.
Soon he returned with a dish only for one, and sat on the bedside to watch Mula ate. He looked extremely sad, a mixture of sadness and anger in his eyes made Mula nervous under their gaze. He lost his appetite, only ate a little then put the dish away.
“It’s not a big deal.” Mula said, “injuries can always heal up soon.”
Khum hung his head, tried to touch his leg. “Not a big deal?” He asked in reply.
“...You could have rely on me.” He rubbed those bandages on Mula again and again like caressing lover’s skin, “I've been growing up. Mula.”
Am I not? Mula thought. Khum had caught so many of his embarrassed moments-- more than anyone, he thought.
He was pushed down on bed, wet kisses falling down onto his neck. “Mula.” He heard his name was called, “Mula.” He couldn’t hear Khum’s other murmur clearly.
He couldn’t even bear the weight of those kisses as if they were falling on his heart, and Khum’s caress heated up his body. He started to get rid of the young man after he realized he was aroused.He patted on Khum’s neck, but Khum seemed to be attached to him, those kisses were even moving into his collar.
“Khum, not now…” He pushed him again, but it didn’t work.
Khum sounded sulky. “No.” He said.
He pulled Mula’s shirt to his wrists and tied them together. He grabbed Mula tightly, licking and kissing him from the chin all the way down to the waist, didn’t give him any chance to move. “I know you need me right now.” He intended to act rashly, getting Mula’s half-arised cock out of his pants. He pinched and rubbed it, use his thumb to scratch the meatus. Khum did it so rudely that made Mula feel pain with his hand without long sharp fingernail. Mula wanted to kick him away, but his right leg hurt badly when he tried to move it.
“Just don’t…!”
Mula was irate, but his struggle was cut off by Khum’s voice.
“You never say anything.” His word came all of a sudden in a low voice, hands still working on the top.
“You never told me when you went out to drink or fight. Or when you were going somewhere far away from me. And now you still don’t tell me anything even if you get hurt this badly.” Khum raised his head, and Mula found the young man looked as if he was gonna cry at any moment. Khum was frowning, “What if you die some day? You’re not about to let me know?”
Mula was shocked, he never considered himself to be where Khum’s anger came from. After this moment of surprise went away, he felt like his heart fell into a huge candyfloss and softened, then his body followed.
“I won’t.” He whispered, using his tied-up hands to wrap Khum. He even lower his head to touch Khum’s face.
This time Khum could no longer pretend to be tough. He couldn’t say a word, tears dropped out from his orbit while his crazy kisses were dropping on Mula’s eyes, cheek and the corner of mouth, his eyepatch and his scars.
There was no way he could continue. He gave Mula a rough organism then escaped. Putting the dish back to kitchen was a good excuse, and the living room also needed to be tidied out. He havered a long time before going back to the bedroom, digging into the blanket after the shower.
Light finally reached the room while the moon was falling from the highest position. It had been a long time, but Mula was still awake. He just lied there without any sense of sleepy, not only because of his injured leg, but also something else.
Eventually he realized that Khum’s tears means a lot to him, which seemed to be where his previous hesitation, stiff act and prudence came from. At this moment, Khum’s presence felt so clear. Mula could tell from the sound that he was also awake, holding his breath and waiting in anxious.
“Spill it.” In the end Mula sighed and said, his voice cracked, “Why?”
Khum sat up. Mula could see in the corner of his sight that his bare shoulders were shining under the moonlight. He was gazing at Mula’s direction.
“I...I never want others.” He said slowly and carefully, as still as a statue. He swallowed, and continued after a pause, “I supposed you know that.”
“You asked me if I wanted to do something before. Well, you forgot it...yeah. You totally forgot, but at that time I thought, fine, you knew what I wanted. But the next day you forgot it all.
Mula changed his posture to make his leg more comfortable, but the friction of blanket seemed so loud that he stopped moving to lie on his back. He didn’t talk, waiting for Khum to go on.
Khum still sat like that, he hunched a little, leaning on the wall.
“But you promised me. I was expecting to be scolded, but you didn’t, and you promised me.” Khum clenched his fist. His hands were hidden in the shadow,.Mula couldn’t see them. “So I think…” he said, “that’s why.”
His voice was not very stable, but he finished the sentence, and his eyes never turned away from Mula. Mula was also in the shadow, but Khum could see more than him. His gaze fell on Mula’s forehead and hair out of the blanket, the eyepatch reflected the cold moonlight in the darkness.
Now the question was thrown back to Mula. He should asked himself: why you didn’t refuse? His brain refused to think about it for even a second. He was speechless, trying to ask more but finding it easy to explain. Only sexual desires couldn’t shape Khum like this, and he found himself never considered about the other reason.
Khum didn’t let the chance go. He felt Mula’s dubiousness, and he asked himself in a quiet voice, “Have I never said that?”
“I love you, Mula.” He said.
Mula’s mind turned blank as if he never knew anything. Khum still looked at him in silence, with no sorry and no guilty.
Suddenly he remembered that several months before, when Khum pressed on him biting his ear, and he was afraid he might left a hole there; and even before that, when the kid hanged his head low, sounding out like “That might not be an accident”.
He couldn’t say a word; he wanted to sigh while laugh seemed to be a proper choice. He turned his head to look at the ceiling.
“So that’s it.” He said.



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